The Art of Bullshit

So, I've been meaning to keep my blog updated--I suppose I have an irrational hope that somehow it'll hit it big and become a halfway decent outlet for my opininos to reach the public--but due to the necessity of keeping my IHSA piece on the top of the page for awhile, I've held off. Since the article clearly has stopped being read, and the thread never really took off on Dyestat.com, I thought perhaps I'd entertain my multitudinous audience with something else, a nice change of pace.

Unfortunately, I have nothing particularly relevant to write about, since during break I ranked having fun ahead of being intellectual, and now being back in school I've had to deal with the harsh reality of finals. (An aside--you DID read that correctly, finals week for Downers Grove North was indeed scheduled to come after two weeks off. Brilliant, right? If you are a DGN student, parent, teacher, or administrator, there was a staff editorial in the most recent Omega about the ludicrous scheduling.)

ANYWAYS--I still have nothing particularly interesting to write about, besides the fact that the classic rock radio playlists at 1:35-2:25 are absolutely the best all day. Any time I'm in the journalism office doing work instead of study hall, I turn the radio on--and 95.9 in particular is just killer at this time of the day. So far we've had some Led Zeppelin, Bon Jovi, Yes, Tom Petty, Van Halen etc. Even if you aren't a fan, it beats the selection in study hall. All I can ever hear is the blasting angry music from the girl behind me who has fooled herself into believing that she's discreet--even though I'm quite sure the teacher can hear her and just doesn't care. It's amazing that she doesn't froth at the mouth while listening to that stuff.

Back to the subject of finals, and school in general; I have an amazing skill that I would like to share with my readers (which isn't risky, considering that as far as I know, there are none). I like to call it "The Art of Bullshit." Perhaps you remember teachers telling you at various levels of school that they were beginning to prepare you for the real world--the next grade would be harsh, you couldn't possibly coast by, so get ready to buckle down. Let me be the first to tell you that they were lying. It is fully possible to completely and utterly BS your way through essays and books at any level of English.

Don't get me wrong, I suggest you read the required material. There is a reason those books are required--most of them are among the finest examples of school-approved literature available. However, as every student knows, sometimes there just isn't the time or the motivation, or maybe the book is just a real stinker--there are certainly some of them in every curriculum. When this is the case, it is possible to coast by on intuition, Sparknotes, online book criticisms (Harvard is nice), and fake text marking. I can't give away my secrets, or perhaps I'll never be able to make them work again--but trust me, you CAN fake it if necessary. If the reader is smart enough, they can even fake it on an impromptu or a reading test, but that may not work for everyone.

The point?--Not that reading is stupid, or that you should fake it and stop doing it. I totally disagree with that--I'm a huge proponent of literature. The real point at stake here is simply that schools have lied all along--they aren't preparing you for any real world, and its not particularly difficult to fake your way through (even in some AP level classes). It's all about knowing how to play a broken system--much like such "real-world" careers as big business and politics.

A POST-SCRIPT FOR THE READER: I'm sorry this was boring, I was jut blowing time during school and didn't edit it or anything. I promise eventually I'll write about things that are important. Keep checking back.